Right before the end, that’s where I lose it. You plan your work and work you plan and you get your result(s). Like spending quality time with old friends, no matter how long you spend, it’s all over too soon. Like weekends; Sunday night as you set your alarm for work on Monday. Technically it’s still the weekend…but is it though?
I remember getting my degree. Well technically I remember everything except for the last few weeks of my final Semester. It actually hit me even weeks before that. I saw the end and I could literally coast to the finish line with nowhere near the effort it had taken to get that far. I saw it like a looming tower of doom and I was already over it. I still had lectures to attend and projects to work on but even if I just phoned it all in, graduation was certain. Here I was still in school, for a little while longer anyway, and I all the excitement was gone. I didn’t go to my graduation. I didn’t really care about it and even now I still don’t. I did what I set out to do and I got my result and I felt a great sense of accomplishment but was somehow not happy it was over.
I only list my accomplishments on my resume. I really am a goal oriented person but it’s never really the goal that matters. I mean the goal does matter but the process is the part I enjoy; the working of the plan. That’s why I need another to jump right into. Life sucks in between plans. If there was ever a time I feel depressed, it is usually during these stretches. Now I try to stagger my plans so there’s no real downtime, just a bit of a time where life is more peaceful and I can take longer breaks.
What made me think of all this? Well… A TV show that I really like and have been following for years finally ended. The ending was great but now I know there will be no more and I feel a sense of loss. I started to think of the times in the past where I felt like this and here we are. On to the next I guess. Allons-y!